Surviving IKEA

Shopping at IKEA may be one of my favorite pastimes. Chasing children around IKEA might be a level of purgatory! The amount of things available for them to touch – and break – is just astounding! Yet like any fool mom I still VOLUNTARILY chose to put myself through that small amount of torture for the ultimate reward!


It was Saturday morning and it was raining at the beach, so EM and I decided to pack the boys into the van and road trip our butts up to Northern Virginia to get baby girl a dresser – and maybe a few, other things.

*Definition: FEW. What one says when you go to IKEA and come out with bags full of things.
Now let’s use that in a sentence. “I went to IKEA and only bought a FEW things, that filled 3 bags.” Few.

Boys buckled, sippy cups filled – with chocolate milk, because why not hype them up for the day – and off we went!

We ended up having the perfect morning! Sunny and in the 60’s! Something we didn’t expect when the weather man called for rainy in the 40’s and 50’s, but alas it is Virginia and I’m pretty sure they just guess the weather here.

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*Let’s call this the before shot.*

EM got to wear his Star Wars shirt and nerd out and mama got to sit and enjoy the Moana Soundtrack over, and over, and over!

Now any smart shopper knows two things! Don’t shop on an empty stomach, ESPECIALLY if you have kids, and make sure you load your iPhone with MOVIES! LOTS. OF. MOVIES!

First stop, Red Robin. Second stop, Buy Buy Baby to look for stroller attachments which they were out of. I love when stores are out of things and they tell you that they can order it for you. Well thanks, so can I. I know they’re only trying to be helpful, but when you schlep your screaming kids into the store – that isn’t what you want to hear. You want to hear “no ma’am, I’m sorry we don’t, but I can have our little worker elves whip one up for you if you’d like.” I mean really, is that too much to ask?!

After that failed trip, across the street to IKEA we went! Like a big blue and yellow beacon of budget design hope! It was a glorious sight!

This pretty much sums up the day!
Sebastian running. Sebastian wanting things. Sebastian rejoicing he gets things!
He carried those popsicle molds around the entire time. Stopping to ask me “mama, take my picture.” To which I said, “say cheese,” the following face was expressed! EM was a total gem and let me enjoy the small little things I normally miss out on as I run down isles saying, “No Bastian! Get back here Bastian! You need to wait for mama Bastian! Bastian are you listening?!” In the end he was mostly good – good enough that mama got him cookies to keep quiet while in the checkout line, because this mama is not above bribery. His brother on the other hand, was more of a screeching pterodactyl.

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Now let’s call this the after shot. Can you see the slight eye twitch?

All in all we left with the dresser and both of our kids, and that made it a win! Oh and a few other things…

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We can’t leave any IKEA trip without our favorite jams and marmalade! All the boys eat for lunch are jam sandwiches, made with the Lingonberry Jam! To make it even better – they’re all organic! Hollar at me crunchy mamas!

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VIRSERUM FrameDEKAD Alarm Clock. Custom Fawnly artwork. All of which currently adorn EM’s nightstand.

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How stinking cute are these pillows? Bastian has the matching bedding for the sun and cloud – so this was a must! Sadly not available online, so get to a store!

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HEMNES 8 – Drawer Dresser

Sadly none of these other items are online either – step up your game Big Blue Store!!! The straw hat, which is perfect for summer, was $2.99!! S called it my cowboy hat! We got two of these baskets and are now using them as the boys laundry baskets. They’re not too big, so they’re easy for them to help carry to the wash. Start them young I say! And who can’t use a throw… or three?! We figured they’d make great in-car blankets for the kiddos.

So to recap!

Martina’s 3 Step Guide to Surviving IKEA

1. MOVIES! Load your phones, ipads, what have you, with movies you know your kids will love. It will successfully calm down a meltdown and keep the tots quiet, for at least a little while!
2. FOOD! Never shop on an empty stomach. Mama gets cranky when she’s hangry and you know toddlers do too! Difference is, we can TRY to act normal – little ones, go buck wild. So to avoid the “I’m hungry” “When are we leaving” whine fest… FEED. THOSE. TUMMIES!
3. BUY ALL THE THINGS! You may not even know that you need it, but you probably do! Like the awesome PRODUCT Milk-frother I forgot to post, because yes there are things I didn’t even show you, $2.79 – you just can’t beat that!

– MB



What better way to start an endeavor but with everyone’s favorite – ICEBREAKERS!!!
I normally hate them with a fiery burning passion – my introvert side of my ambivert self comes charging through when icebreakers are brought up – but I figured it could be a fun way to let y’all know a bit about what makes me tick.
So here we go with a 20 Questions version of break that ice!

1: What is your full name: Martina Maria Bohnslav. Try saying that last name correctly!
I always wanted a “cool” last name as mine growing up was so plain jane. I dreamed of the day I’d get married and get one that would make my name POP! Well, be careful what you wish for. I love my husband so much and I love that we will all share his name, but Bohnslav was certainly not what I had imagined when envisioning my future married self. Granted, not too sure what I did envision, but I know this wasn’t it.

2: What is your birthday: August 19th! Fun little fact – EM was born a month to the day before me. Now neither of us are EVER allowed to forget a birthday. I always wanted to marry an older man!

3: What was your childhood like: Grew up in Florida before moving to Virginia as a freshly turned teen. Spent summers and many holidays in Italy. My mom is from Firenze and all of her family is still there. Italy is my second home. I have 4 younger brothers, though they’re all much taller than I am and two pretty cool parents. Just don’t tell them. Was a competitive Irish dancer and am SO stoked that we will now have a little girl to HOPEFULLY follow in mamas dance steps!

4: What languages do you speak: English – sort of. Sometimes. Momish takes over most of the time and then you’re lucky if what I say makes any sense at all. And Italian, being my first language. EM got Rosetta Stone for Christmas, so hopefully he can learn it as well. I really want our kids to grow up bilingually. Though let me tell you, it is not as easy when the other adults you need to speak to don’t speak the language, consistency tends to be an issue.

5: What is your favorite color: Make that colors! Gold, blush, a light coral, and shades of blue and green.

6: What do you currently drive: A pimpin’ minivan named Natasha! I can’t believe that I just said that, but I do. I drive a minivan. I always swore it would NEVER happen. One of those over my dead body type things. So I’m guessing I’m writing this from the other side, but man when we test drove the 2017 Pacifica – it was love! We traded in our beloved Explorer and joined the mom mobile gang! Oddly enough, we have people stop us and ask us how much we love this car. True story, it’s that cool!

7: What is your current in-car soundtrack: Moana, specifically You’re Welcome, or as S calls it “Maui Time”.

8: What is your favorite flower: Almost anything white. Even carnations if they’re white I enjoy. Might explain why when I had my wedding bouquet made, I just said make it white! White roses, peonies, margarita daisies, tulips, hydrangeas, ranunculus – even simple baby’s breath.  I love them all!

9: What is your favorite ice-cream: Hazelnut Gelato, from anywhere in Italy. Haagen-Dazs used to make a hazelnut flavored ice-cream and it was DELICIOUS, but the no longer make it. Bring it back Haagen-Dazs bring. it. back! Or send me any hidden tubs you have lying around. One or the other. I’m flexible.

10: What is your favorite music to workout to: Dance party mixes or gangster rap! Those beats just get you moving! Not that this sack of pregnant potatoes has done all too many workouts recently. I did start PiYo yesterday, so feeling pretty darn proud of myself!

11: You’re expecting baby number 3, are you done: Ha! No! I’ve always hope for 4-5 kids and EM has always said 3. 3 was what I considered my “minimum” (God willing) and from now on I think we will just see where our road takes us. At the moment I’d say I’d still want another one or two, but God has always had plans for us that we didn’t imagine – so we shall see!

Now side note mini rant! For any of you mamas that can relate, or anyone that has pregnant friends or friends with kids, here’s a little FYI, it’s really annoying when people hear you have 3 kids or at least one of each gender and assume you’re done having kids. Like you hit some sort of magical kid quota. Back off buddy! Some people WANT a big family. It really blows my mind how such a personal decision between a husband and wife is somehow everyone’s business. If you have more than 3, you get the “do you know how that happens?” I want to say “Nope, still haven’t figured that one out, guess we will have to have a few more, we are slow learners.” Or the, “was it planned?” well to be honest, surprise or not, not too sure how that’s ANY of your business. If a couple wants to have one kid or go full on Duggar, that is NO ones business but their own! Each family is uniquely beautiful and has its own unique story. Stop being a busybody and back that nose out of other people’s baby making or not making! On that note – it’s just as rude to ask “are you going to have anymore kids?” “don’t you WANT more?” Unless you’re super close with that person, probably NOT the best thing to ask. You don’t know their reasons as to why they do or don’t have a certain number of kids and again, it’s none of your business.

Ok. End mini rant.

12: What is your favorite clothing stores: LoftBanana Republic Gap, J. Crew, and Nordstrom. Could I be anymore of a basic white girl?  *Hold please as I sip my Starbucks*
I just love the effortless looks with classic style. I don’t really have a lot of time to try things on when shopping with two rambunctious boys. Adding a third to the mix, I’m sure will only make things more difficult, so I love knowing that I can walk into those stores and find things I’ll love and that will make me feel confident, no matter what stage of postpartum I’m in. I’m starting to expand into online boutique shopping – not as brave in that category as sizes can vary, but Thistle & Finn is one I LOVE! Their customer service is amazing and their clothes are downright the fabulous! Love adding in a bit of boho flare into this classic girls wardrobe. Keeps me hip and cool! Exactly what my kids want in a mom!

13: What are your go to shoes: As a prego, TOMS and Birkenstocks! Not only are they cute but woah baby are they comfortable! Exactly what I need. My feet and hands don’t swell all too much when I’m pregnant, but they become as flat as pancakes and wider than a truck! So comfort and style is a must! Currently heart eye emoji-ing all over these copper birks! Might need to snag pair!

14: Where did you and EM honeymoon: Italy! Spent two weeks there. One week in Firenze, in a family owned apartment and one week at a hotel in Forte Dei Marmi (small beach town in Tuscany). Probably two of my favorite places on earth! EM had been to Rome but he had never been to either of these two cities and being able to share them with the man I love was extra special! Though throw in family visits during your honeymoon and you make for one PATIENT husband. We will have to have a family free honeymoon part deux in the future. You know with all that free time we have raising kids!

15: What is one thing EM does that drives you insane: He is surprisingly VERY organized (minus losing his wallet, phone, and keys, ALMOST daily) and loves to clean, but Lord help that man if he puts a wet towel or shoes on our bed again. I’m really not that big of a neat freak, he probably wishes I was, but I grew up with four brothers, I quickly learned to get used to the boyness of it all. Though a wet towel and dirty shoes on our bed might be the death of me, or him. It would ultimately come down to an American Gladiator style battle. I know he cannot possibly be the only man who does this and I cannot possibly be the only wife who wants to scream! Right? It’s just SO gross. I’m fully aware that I have had baby poop smeared all over my sheets and toddler vomit on my pillow, but you SEE those things! You wash those things! Immediately! With very VERY hot water and LOTS of bleach! But shoe germs…especially when I might not have known the shoes were put on the bed to begin with, are invisible – they hide waiting to pounce on me as I sleep hoping I get sick. Which as any parent knows is more like getting the plague! When one family member gets sick, you ALL get sick, and mama is the only one that doesn’t get a chance to sleep it off. So TAKE THE NASTY SHOES OFF MY BED! Oh, and the wet towels, really? Must I explain? I don’t want to have to play the game of “wet towel or pee?” Sniff and see! No thanks, I’ll pass!

16: What is your favorite home scent: Currently digging this candle we got at Home Goods by DW Home – Coconut Milk Honey (there’s the Amazon link incase your Home Goods store doesn’t carry it…though we definitely saved mula buying it in store). It just smells so good! I’m not a fan of overly sweet scents or anything that smells to coconuty, don’t want our place smelling like a bottle of sunblock, and this just finds that perfect balance! Might have to go back and see if they have more and stock up. They had two sizes but we got the bigger one because it’s THAT good!

17: What is you must have accessory: A go to pair of earrings, preferably pearls as they go with EVERYTHING. Now what my favorite momcessory is, is another story. It’s a hat. Why? Because when you don’t have time to shower or do your hair and you need to get kids dressed, fed, and out the door and less than an hour – a hat is your BEST friend! Wear some workout gear, throw on some mascara and hide that greasy knotty mess up under that hat mama, then walk out that door and OWN it!

18: What is your guilty pleasure: Buying ESSIE nail polish. I own so many, so so many. I just can’t help it! It’s like art supplies! You want to own it all even if you don’t always use them all! You never know when you could be in the mood for purple! EM doesn’t understand how I have multiple shades of each color. To him pink is pink and red is red, but listen gents a ladies nails are like adult mood rings! They go with how you’re feeling so you better be prepared for when you’re in a light shade of green kinda mood! Speaking of, I just got the most amazing shade of green at Target the other day! It’s called On the Roadie and sadly seems to be sold out online, but STALK your Targets, CVS’s etc and get this color! It’s perfect for St Patrick’s day and great for spring!

19: What is your current obsession: Binge watching different tv series on Netflix! Just finished the Great British Bake Off and I’ve been making desserts non stop! To the point where EM had to ask me to stop. Hey if I’m gonna get plump so will you buddy! Not to mention I’m planning on doing Whole 30 once our daughter is born this summer and need to get my sweets in now while I still can!

20: What is one embarrassing fact about you: I like to belt out Torn by Natalie Imbruglia while I’m in the shower. The shower has the BEST acoustics, so I can at least pretend to sound good, as the sound of the rushing water drowns me out. I hope!

BOOM! DONE! ICE BROKEN! Ok, so that wasn’t so bad. Kinda fun actually. If you think of any fun questions or your just downright nosey – feel free to leave a comment or contact me and who knows, maybe I’ll do a 20 questions part 2 in the future!

– MB